A few hours ago, a family member shared with me their terminal cancer diagnosis. The call was extremely brief, yet plays on loop in mind. Not just for the shitty news but also because of my extra shitty response.
Me: Hello. Is everything okay?
Them: No. I’ve been diagnosed with terminal cancer.
Me: Fuck.
Me: Fuck.
Me: Fuck.
Them: (starting to cry) I have to go. I’ll talk to you later.
Call ends.
FUCK.
Let’s recap. Someone shares with me the absolute worst personal news ever, and my response is to open and close my mouth like a goldfish while repeatedly swearing. To the point where my behaviour causes them to hang up and not answer any attempts at calls or texts since then.
I’m not saying I know what I should have said instead, because I don’t. But I know it wasn’t that.
Marla, Unpacked 